Mom's 1st memorial mass

Today, we memorialized my mom. I woke up with no desire to get out of bed. All morning, I kept remembering that this time last year, I got up and had no idea that within a few hours, my life would never be the same. I kept replaying in my head, every last detail about that morning. I remember waking up and hearing the garage door close as she pulled out of the garage for the very last time. I just wanted to get today over with, but in the end, it was very bitter sweet. I think we all payed a lovely tribute to a wonderful woman. Her mass was very tearful, yet beautiful and It was nice to see so many people come, despite the rainy weather. This showed me that my mom was so influential in so many lives. The hardest part though was being back in that church, sitting in the same spot, seeing my dad, brother and especially my baby girls cry. It was like reliving her funeral all over again. There we were, in that front row of the church, angry, sad and heartbroken. I'm still trying to accept the fact that this is all part of God's plan and that this was not something he did to us out of spite. My mom worried and cared about everyone and now she has a wonderful view from Heaven where she can watch over all of us at once and as the overachiever that she is, I'm sure she has mastered using her Angel wings. I also made sure today we thanked all our friends and family, because without their support, we would have never survived this year. I have learned so much about my mom over this past year though all the stories and memories shared by everyone and this all helps reassure me that my mom will never be forgotten. She lives in all of our hearts and I will do all that I can to keep her memory alive. I love you Mom. Rest in Paradise.